Hear me out... You know that awesome little organizer thing-a-ma-jig that keeps your six-pack of PBR* together? That little doohickey is a convenient contraption from the St. Louis, Missouri company ITW Hi-Cone (with its debut in 1960); the correct name is a "yoke" and man those are neat, until the overexaggerated heresay that animals get caught in them comes true. If you still don't grasp the concept, please refer to DIAGRAM 1.a, watch the video, and then go save the world with the instructions below.

DIAGRAM 1.a



Find out what you can about "the Great Pacific Garbage Patch" and then go see Ray at the Booze Shop and follow his sage advice: grab a best-selling 6-pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon cans (*which recently surpassed Kokanee cans as the best selling 6-slingers) and remove the cans from the plastic "yoke" and toss your bevs in a backpack. Cut the "yoke" so that nothing can become trapped in it, and RECYCLE that unnecessary accessory, then spread the word and enjoy your classic premium lager brew responsibly, like usual. Full cans may be chilled in the Fitzsimmons Creek, empty ones belong in the blue recycling bins. See you at the skatepark.